My holiday thought this year is designed to make us change some of our holiday traditions. Here it goes: Hang up, sign off, power down, and turn off. When that is completed we need to: pick up, play around, get out, focus on, and enjoy. Now that you think I have lost my marbles, this is what I am talking about. We are busy people, and technology has invaded our lives in a mighty way. 

The moments we have with family are treasured times. When those times are continually bombarded with emails, phone calls, and television programs that we have seen twenty times before, our family time suffers. Time with those we love does not count if our attention is defused by our tech world. When you are out in public watch how often people that are together are disconnected by technology. Some may feel that as adults this might work, but the kids would never go along. My challenge is to try. When they see they have your time and attention, they might just play along. The most precious gift you can give to those you love is yourself. After all is that not what this holiday is all about?



Autumn in Atlanta

It is autumn once again in Atlanta, Georgia. This is without a doubt my favorite time of year. The temperature is great, and where spring may have flowers, autumn is when every leaf has color making the whole forest colorful.  For me God’s handiwork is evident all around during this time of year. I do not even need to take a trip to the North Georgia Mountains. 

Autumn is also the beginning of a downward slide toward the holidays. Thanksgiving is the time for turkey and trimmings with those you love. It is also a time to stop and give thanks to the Creator for all the blessings you enjoy each day.



What Shape Are You?

If you have ever visited any of the Disney parks, you will see trees in the shape of cartoon characters.  Disney World in Orlando has over 200 of these trees on their property.  These ornamental creations are not an overnight task with a set of electric hedge trimmers. Some of the shapes take from ten to fifteen years to hold their form. From the time the plant is small, horticulture experts trim and shape the seedlings. Their shape and form is decided early in the life of the plant. The trimming talents of an expert require more than anything a plan for the final shape.  After years of work, the character tree is transplanted into the Disney gardens for all to enjoy.

We all have a creator that shapes and cares for us. There are times when the pruning may seem difficult, but the final result is a blessing to all.



Under the Gun

Ever travel down the highway and see a patrol car on the side of the road with a radar gun pointed at you? First you look at your speedometer and then you look in your rear view mirror to see if the patrol car is still sitting there, or on the move.  This is just one more thing to add to the already high rate of stress in your life.  Unfortunately, many of us use our “radar” guns as we put the lives of our family, neighbors, and co-workers on the screen of surveillance to highlight and expose their misdeeds.  Too often, we are looking for failures and violations of expectations or standards that we somehow feel we must patrol for exacting compliance. 

It is hard enough to handle the stress and problems in our own lives. When we attempt to run the lives of those around us, we add to our already elevated stress level. A statement that might help is “Why do you worry about the speck in your neighbor’s eye, when you have a board in your own eye?” Rather than looking for the negative, try to praise the positive.



The Summer of 2010

Some of you have been on vacations to the beach, mountains, cruses, and journeys across this great country or around the world. Others decided to stay at home this year and just enjoy the satisfaction of completing some of the to-do list. One thing we all agree is that summer is here.  Those of us that are more thermally protected are ready for winter to return. I do not however desire to wish my days away.  Each day brings with it both challenges and blessings. If you are not careful you will miss the blessing while fighting the challenges. So I have a simple message. This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Take time to talk with a friend, enjoy the beauty of creation, or if you are lucky enough hold a newborn child.



Do you Remember?

I have reached the point in my life where keeping a list is a requirement. I keep a list for shopping items, I keep a list of ‘things to do’, and I keep a list of things I have already completed. My memory is not what it used to be, or at least I do not think it is. I do not feel bad about keeping these lists. Santa has done it for hundreds of years. The sad part is how I must maintain the lists. The truth is I have actually sent myself emails to remind me to put something on my list.

In my job having memory problems is both good and bad. It is bad when I do not remember names, events in people’s lives, or an appointment.  It is good when I do not remember things done to me where I have already offered forgiveness. One thing I never want is a list of people that I am not willing to forgive. Even more important I never want to have a ‘No Mercy’ list. That is a list of people that I do not even want God to forgive.



The Princess and the Frog

How old were you when you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend? Children's programming has always been filled with Cinderella’s needing a Prince Charming, and a Frog waiting for a kiss from a Princess. We are taught early on that we need to have a special person to be complete and make our dreams come true. Until that special meeting we are only a Cinderella or frog in the mirror each morning. I wish there was a way to undo the cultural standards but I fear it is too ingrained in who we need to be.

I would like to offer a different perspective. Let me start with all of the beautiful princess and handsome princes that are the Fidelity family (that means everyone). Each of us is created in the likeness of our Creator. We have been given the gifts and talents to shine in our own special way. To the Creator we are all special and beautiful. Like the stars in night’s sky, we each bring our individual beauty, to those around us. Collectively we shine brighter than any one eye can behold.



Do you lead or push?

As a parent I was taught by my children that they learned better when I lead them instead of pushing them. If there was an important life lesson for them to experience, I attempted to push the lesson down their sweet adorable throats. The result was they choked on the lesson and did not learn a thing. As my development continued I learned that we all learn better when lead rather than being pushed.  We all have those family members that we have attempted to push into the responsible person we want them to be. No matter how many times we attempt the same approach over and over we get the same result, they do not change. Might I suggest a different approach, lead them out.

Leading is also more difficult at times. Leading may require them to fail without you coming to the rescue. You help them find their own way out, with love and patience. This is not a new way of teaching, and it is not listed in the best practices. I wish I could take credit for it but this method is modeled after a Good Shepherd that leads me beside still waters, and in the paths of righteousness. So try being a leader and not a pusher. It is still a challenge for me.



Turn Your Radio Off

Do you ever feel like your life is similar to one of the cable news stations? Can you picture it? The main story is front and center. At the same time you have a ticker or two with additional information running at the bottom of the screen. There might also be a picture in picture being broadcast with someone in a remote situation. If you add to that closed captioning your life might be too busy. I promise you are not alone.

When was the last time that you had a time of total solitude? I know life is busy and time is precious. Even when we are in our cars there is a radio or music, phone calls, emails, and texting (when we are parked of course). Please learn to take time to stop and be still once in a while. Listen to and watch nature. Enjoy a sunrise or sunset; I also enjoy rainbows.  A short time of meditation or quite time can be more refreshing than a full night’s sleep.



Do Not Forget

Do you remember the era of time when the Fuller brush and encyclopedia salesman would go door to door? Where are they now? My guess is they hopped on the truck with the milkman and are somewhere eating the ice chips. Times change, and that is not a bad thing. The set of encyclopedia books were at first replaced by a CD, and now it is online at the touch of a finger. The Fuller brush man was replaced by Wal-Mart’s yellow price guy. The milkman is still around, but his truck no longer needs ice chips.

There is good news Valentine’s Day is still on February 14th. It is a day to reach out to those special people in your life and express your love. For the men, this is a reminder to get your card early and not on your way home from work. That would not work this year anyway. Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday, which I believe is the best day to celebrate love.  A day of rest and to remember those we love, and best of all a God of love.



A New Decade 

Quick question, why before time saving devices did people have time to sit out on their front porch, but now that we have all of these time saving tools, we do not even have a front porch? Time is one example of total equality in today’s world. It does not matter if you are old, young, rich, poor, or even how well educated you are. Everyone only has twenty-four hours per day.  There might be some that have a longer life than others, but each day is the same worldwide. Everyone is truly equal on that point.

Ten years ago we were concerned about Y2K. Yes, that was ten years ago. The worries we had at that time turned out to be in people’s minds and not in reality. What are you worried about today? Worrying does not take the problem out of tomorrow; it only takes your strength out of today. Were there goals you had set for yourself ten years ago?

Are there things in your home that you have been saving for a special occasion? You know what I mean the good china, or that special outfit, that you have been saving. You should never save anything for a special occasion – we should treat each day as special. As a reminder remember that each day is a gift, that is why we call it the present. Do not spend all your energy dealing with your past, or the future, but focus on the day. Spend time with a friend, eat off of the good china, and thank the God and Creator of all.